The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
