Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
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