More tranny stories later!
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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