what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
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