how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
Randomize
