it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
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