So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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