So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
