sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
I think people are normalizing furries
Randomize
