Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Randomize
