At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
Randomize