Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
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