i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
