We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
jump out the window naked night went bad
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
Randomize
