He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
Randomize
