I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Randomize