He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
