Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
Randomize
