I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize
