If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize
