Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
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