Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
Bring me that man meat
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize