so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Randomize