Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
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