I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Randomize
