dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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