im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
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