How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
Randomize
