oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
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