i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
I think a kid would responsible me up
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
Randomize
