I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
