You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
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