this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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