dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
