they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Randomize
