how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Randomize
