You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
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