took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
