youre lurking in front of me
Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Randomize