So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
Randomize
