I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
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