Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Randomize
