We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
Randomize
