So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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