Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
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