You really coming over, don't trick.
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Randomize