I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
Randomize
