The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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