Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize
