im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize
