I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize